Faith
Um so it’s now 4 to midnight (we’re hitting Thursday ‘ere) and it’s just occurred to me that my linen has been hanging out to literally die for the last 2 days now. And no, it’s not as if it’s been sunny sunshine skies in the past 48 hours.
What, Auckland weather- predictable?
Man that’s like asking for the sky to fall down- like now.
You can tell I’ve had a good day. On the contrary, I really should be this whingy thing as I had a 12 hour day of working non-stop, a solid hour of choreography and finishing its splendidness with teaching dance.
I really should be an angry tart as this morning I found my bunch of key chains/tags I’ve had forever missing from my set of keys and the only possible explanation to that is that they must’ve fallen off while I was on my way to a meeting in town last night.
I really really should be livid as my physio confirmed that my right rotator cuff is crapping out and its tendons inflamed from training and I was asked today by my flatm8 whether I was on drugs as I’ve been cranky of late and have lost a lot of weight in a short span of time.
With all that crap thrown at me, I really should be cross shouldn’t I?
But you know what?
I can’t really care.
In an effort of anger management and trying to curb the damn thing, I’ve taken to training my spiritual side- by reading the Good book.
…
Okay I’m not talking about joining some insipid religious association and on the pretense of furthering my godly ties, throwing myself shamelessly at some dumb lad during mass. For those of you at this very point in time feeling lost as a dodo, let me clarify my last sentence for you by taking you on a short detour of my reminiscing my childhood.
In high school, I was pretty much like how I am now, except I think I was a tad quieter and less cussier. However I was just as opinionated then as I am now and if I had an opposing view to things, I assure you, you’d be the first to know, and hey, I’d tell it like it is- no holds barred.
What I found amusing was that due to my tendency for speaking aloud and not censoring myself, there were certain people, say girls in my form, that would crucify me for my lack of tact. Which was ironic cause I mean, one of their beliefs was to be non-judgemental.
Anyhow (we’re straying from what I originally was going to say), these certain good girls believed in attending mass, even at interschool events. While the pretense was Christ in His Holy name, really it was more of a "hmmm, now which Christian boy can I date/pretend to/lust after/whatever".
Fast forward a couple of years later, I can only imagine, what these "good girls" are up to now (yeah the stories you hear through the grapevine only tends to heighten one’s already vivid imagination).
Hey for the record, my only vice is swearing. I don’t smoke, drink or do drugs. And back in the day, these were the people judging my character and demonizing it to our peers.
*ahems* Nyways, back to my initial story I’m just reading through it, not cover to cover as I was advised that it wasn’t the way to go.
My favourite quote at the moment is "Refrain from anger, turn from wrath".
So yeah, have a go. You’ll be surprise at what you find. I tend to just randomly skim through pages and for some unexplainable reason, whatever mood I’m in, there seems to be a passage that dispells any melancholy.
Growing faith and having it in the palm of your hand again… is somewhat refreshingly beautiful.
